Would You Pay To Have A Coffee Date With A Rat?

Unfortunately, this is what the world has come to. I am aware that everyone needs companionship once in a while (with a rat?) but this is taking it way too far! The San Francisco Dungeon is a “60-minute, live-action journey through 200 years’ worth of the Bay Area’s most riveting — and sinister — history.” Now, for a limited time this summer, it is offering guests a new creepy experience.

For just $50, people can “sip their coffee while seated at bistro-style tables, nicely draped with red and white gingham tablecloths…all while being surrounded by live rats.” You will get coffee, tea, or water, and a breakfast pastry.

How much did they pay those people to take that picture? Why are they smiling? Are they under a spell? Have people already forgotten about the Black Plague? I just have so many questions. You’d have to pay me to ever willingly be in the proximity of a rat.

“We want to offer a frighteningly funny encounter with creepy-crawly critters you could only find at The San Francisco Dungeon,” spokesman Matthew Clarkson, said in a press release. “Drinking coffee while a rat is on the loose? That’s not for the faint of heart.”

After dining with the rodents crawling on you, you get to interact with the rats for 15 minutes. The rats will be provided by Rattie Ratz, a local nonprofit dedicated to rat adoption and welfare. Clarkson told Eater that the food wouldn’t be made where the rats are dwelling. “We’re obviously following all food code and hygiene requirements,” he said.

Some Americans actually seem to to be pretty on board.

Americans, or anyone not living anywhere near the Bay Area, here’s some free advice. Come to India. If you’re willing to spend $50 dollars on a date with a rat I can assure you that it will be much cheaper here, probably less than $10. Also, I’ll bet money that it will be at least 10 times more frightening.

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