As a shameless child, I would beam at the waiter in a Chinese restaurant at the end of every meal and grab two full handfuls of fortune cookies. I would then proceed to tear off the wrapper and break the cookie in half and excitedly read my multiple fortunes, some of which would contradict the others. My parents were left to try and eat all the discarded cookies. While most fortune cookies dispel wisdom or predict a very general event, some choose instead to be witty, humorous and sometimes amusingly rude. These are now our favourite types. A quick search on Twitter allowed us to find a bunch of fortune cookies that would crack us up. What about you?
It’s like a magic eight ball saying ‘try again later.’ Except, for this cookie, the answer will always be the same.
— enrico (@enricovarrasso) August 30, 2015
Well, that’s heartening.
— Fates Cookies (@FatesCookies) August 29, 2015
Oh, and how!
— ❥ 킴벌리 (@kimin_bts_) August 28, 2015
A marketing tool that, if fed to happy people with full stomachs, may just work.
— heavynuggets is sodagiant (@heavynuggets) August 28, 2015
We’re sure there’s a deeper meaning there. Just give us a few minutes to laugh as we imagine an elephant in tap shoes and we’ll figure it out.
Somehow, it seems more likely that a pet cat is planning this ultimate evil than your new puppy.
Some cookies chose to focus on the ugly truth.
— 🦄Sabrina Lotfi🦄 (@LoftilyLotfi) August 27, 2015
What if the next one said the same?
— Nursing School Probs (@NursSchoolProb) August 27, 2015
Depressing for that minority.
— Fates Cookies (@FatesCookies) August 26, 2015
Why thank you, kind fortune cookie!
— James Lockman (@jameslockman) August 26, 2015
That’s really helpful.
Into some wisdom some randomness should also fall.